My guest today is Dr. Catherine Pearlman. During our conversation, Dr. Pearlman gives lots of great advice for parents to help prepare teens for life after high school. Some of the things we talk about include teaching consequences rather than nagging, how to let go and allow space when your teens aren’t engaging, the important shift in parenting that must happen between the elementary and middle school years, and how we should be promoting adulting in every way possible.
About Dr. Catherine Pearlman
Dr. Catherine Pearlman is the author of Ignore It!: How Selectively Looking the Other Way Can Decrease Behavioral Problems and Increase Parenting Satisfaction. She’s also the founder of The Family Coach, a private practice specializing in helping families resolve everyday problems related to discipline, sleep, sibling rivalry, and other issues. She is the proud parent of a son and a daughter and her syndicated Dear Family Coach column has appeared in the Wall Street Journal and many regional parenting magazines. She has appeared on The Today Show and her advice has been featured in Parenting, Men’s Health, CNN, and The Huffington Post. Dr. Pearlman is a licensed clinical social worker who’s been working with children and families for more than twenty years. She is an assistant professor of social work at Brandman University and received a Ph.D. in social welfare from Yeshiva University and a master’s of social work from New York University.
Episode Highlights
- The similarities between toddlers and teens
- Letting go and allowing space when your teens don’t engage
- Teaching teens consequences rather than nagging
- The rise in depression and anxiety in teens
- Screen time during the pandemic
- Helping teens re-enter the world after the pandemic
- Why Catherine wrote the article titled “It doesn’t matter to me where my kids go to college.”
- The opportunity cost of teens participating in activities they don’t care about
- The important shift in parenting from elementary to middle school years
- Parents need to take a huge step back and let teens make their own mistakes
- Teens’ achievements do not define who they are
- Promote adulting in every way possible
- It is our job as parents to put ourselves out of a job
- Find some common ground with your teen to strengthen your relationship
- They’re not lazy. There’s usually something else going on.
- Work together with your teen to identify the right path after high school
Resources
Ignore It!: How Selectively Looking the Other Way Can Decrease Behavioral Problems and Increase Parenting Satisfaction by Dr. Catherine Pearlman
It Doesn’t Matter to Me Where My Kids Go To College by Dr. Catherine Pearlman